Homeland ahoy! The rattle and chill of a journey home.

As I start planning my trip back to Australia in November, I realise that I am not feeling so easy about the whole thing. Strange really, as I ahve cried, moaned, and pittied myself for the best part of the alst 3 years about poor me, no chance to see the people I have loved the longest. Why though? What makes me feel all stringy in the stomach? What provokes the feeling of hmmmm, perhaps I will just go when I have rights to take leave?

I flicked through my facebook pics last night and saw pictures of old friends with new loves, new cars, new children, new pets, new jobs - all of which I know nothing about. I am like a visitor who has never been before to a lot of people. I have the old times stories, I have the 'do you remember when....'lead in line with many of them, yet the 'now'stuff (see I know how to use quotation marks correctly being an English teacher) I am as foreign too as the old stuff of many of my friends here in Brazil. I am now seeming to be living in a halfway zone of new and old friend.

I ahve managed, thankfully, to keep myself in reasonable shape, so when I go back it wont be, "Wow that Hayley Gogeff got porky" I ahve managed to keep myself very educated and well travelled, which should facilitate conversation, depending on who I am talking to.
Everything here is so comfortable. I know where to geta  great bite to eat (Giu and Kate), I know where I get all my great imported things (Jess and la palma), I know where to get my party on (the couch girls who have numerous pics in Rachel`s album of VIP guests) and I know where to get my schooling from (too manyplaces to name here). yet, when I go back to good old cultural Melbourne, I will be like a tourist in my own city! I don't knwo where to eat, where to party, where to buy great books, where to pick up the best mushrooms. I don't know what the drink of choice of anyone is (although being Australian I gues that would be anything with alcohol in it). I do however, know what I like and don't like. I know that my tastes have changed in a major way since I left that little town and that big city that I oscilated between all those years ago. I know that my opinions, are even more open minded than they were back then, controvertial some may say.

I guess what I fear is not fitting in. It is almost like going back to school again, ang being the stranger whilst everyone else in in their comfortable little group.
I don´t want it to be difficult, or uncomfortable. I do hope that the subject matter is interesting and upbeat and a whole load of laughs.

I guess while I am here with my friends and family in Brasil, I have my work, my style, my girlfriends, my puppy and my darling Tiago that all represent the Hayley of today. And I love that. I love the comfort of it, the natural way of it all.
I dread the fact that I am going to be listening to native English speakers making crass grammatical errors all the time, just the thought of the classic Australian interchange of me and my makes me cringe. Imagine when a 'yous' comes out or an 'I seen the uver (other to the rest of us) day...' comment. It pains me to the back teeth to think that all the work I do here with PoGo Communications teaching, reviewing text, translating etc is all but gone to waste when I see my students off to the homeland only to have them e-mail me upon arrival to ask "Miss Hayley why did you teach me X when everyone says Y...?" in a muddle because I have taught them how to speak correctly.

So, nerves and all I will be visiting the homeland for the first time in 4 years in November of 2011. Quite an achievement for a girl who didn't even own a bed this time last year (thank you Aunty Hilde for you help and guidance).

So, I am going to do some research, educate myself on the psyche of the human who must readjust to one's natural habitat over a short duration of time. Study, it seems to me, along with the exchange of personal experience, to be the key factor in dealing with most of lifes prickles. Find out the lastest, greatest and unique (Marcos) about anything and with the power of knowledge, you can conquer.

Any tips, email me please!

For the meantime however, keep studying, keep finding out new information to make yourself a more interesting person and a more useful tool to both yourself and others.

Miss Hayley
PoGo Communications - Brazil